This isn't a blog but an eloquence of excuses.
I need output. Creation. Dialogue.
[I lack risk.]
Unintentionally, it lacks truth as well, though I have been able to gain some from reading it. I'll usually read (and edit) an entry the day after I write it, hoping that during that time I have gained some level of separation from the previous day's emotions. Through this less biased eye, I have realized numerous self-delusions and a snide, bitter tone looming over too many of the entries. There are more laments here than revelations. Do I think like this? Probably, but I just can't see it in the moment. Can this be unlearned, corrected? I seem to want to unlearn just as much as I want to learn but I'm not doing anything to reverse my bad habits: it's so much easier for me to start something new than fix something broken.
I need output. Creation. Dialogue.
[I lack risk.]
Unintentionally, it lacks truth as well, though I have been able to gain some from reading it. I'll usually read (and edit) an entry the day after I write it, hoping that during that time I have gained some level of separation from the previous day's emotions. Through this less biased eye, I have realized numerous self-delusions and a snide, bitter tone looming over too many of the entries. There are more laments here than revelations. Do I think like this? Probably, but I just can't see it in the moment. Can this be unlearned, corrected? I seem to want to unlearn just as much as I want to learn but I'm not doing anything to reverse my bad habits: it's so much easier for me to start something new than fix something broken.
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